Agent C
by hannahml
Summary: When Perry trains a new agent, only chaos can ensue! How could naive little Chocolate help Perry stop one of Doofenshmirtz' most diabolical schemes yet?
1. The New Agent

**(A/N) DISCLAIMER! I do not own _Phineas and Ferb_, Doofneshmirtz, Monogram, Perry the Platypus, Pinky the Chihuahua, Terry the Turtle, Peter the Panda, or Carl Karl.**

**(A/N) Carlos the Clown is copyright WakkoWarnerLover on deviantart.**

**(A/N) Hannah Smith and Chocolate the Chocolate lab are copyrighted to me.**

* * *

"Good morning Agent P. Normally, I would say, 'Doofenshmirtz is up to something, and you should put a stop to it.'" Major Monogram greeted the Agent. "But I can't, because he isn't. Which ties into the 'good news, bad news' I have for you."

Perry shifted in his seat. The last time MM had given him a 'good news, bad news', he had ended up relocated and with a new nemesis. He nervously gestured for his boss to continue.

"OK, so the bad news: After you foiled Doofenshmirtz's scheme yesterday, he was hospitalized for the weekend due to several minor burns. It was his fault, but the point is that you can't fight him today. Sorry Agent P."

Perry faked a disappointed look. "Bad news, my webbed foot!" He chattered, "I get to hang out with Phineas and Ferb today for once!"

Unable to understand Perry's chatter, Monogram continued. "Now, the good news." He flashed a picture of a 10 year old girl on the screen. "Just yesterday, this girl came into our agent assignment center—you know, our 'Pet Adoption Center'—and adopted one of our newest recruits. I do believe this girl is friends with your owners?"

Smiling, Perry nodded and chattered a reply, "I like Hannah…"the agent's eyes unfocused for a second, "She gives me back rubs…" Catching sight of Agent P's eyes, Monogram shouted and waved his arms to get Perry's attention.

Regaining his composure, the Major continued. "Anyways, I think the new recruit she adopted had great potential as an agent. I want this one to have the best training possible. So, I have put Chocolate the Chocolate Lab under your supervision. "

Grinning, Perry turned his chair towards the door as Major Monogram called out, "Chocolate, come on sweetie, come and meet Agent P!"

""Sweetie"? Why are you calling Chocolate 'sweetie' unless…" Perry frowned. "No, no, can't be. I don't know of any agents that are…."

From the doorway peeked a sleek brown head. Perry's worst fear was confirmed when he heard the newest OWCA recruit's voice.

"I can't believe the new agent is a girl!" Perry raged.

"Are you sure it's not because she's a dog?" his best friend, Pinky the Chihuahua, joked. The two friends were in the OWCA conference room eating lunch together before their daily missions. "You tend to hold a grudge against dogs. Or so I hear."

"No, I just hate you sometimes." Perry rolled his eyes. "'Sides, if I said I hated dogs, Dan would have buried me headfirst on the Little Duffers Fairway by now." The platypus paused to chew his mealworm and insect larvae mash.

"Speaking of Dan…" Pinky grinned and waved their fellow agent over. Dan the Dog sat down next to Pinky. "Hey bro, Perry was just grumbling about you!"

Dan gave the platypus a toothy grin and punched him in the shoulder. "Love ya too buddy." Perry groaned and scooted his chair farther away from Dan.

Pinky got up from his grilled cheese and pulled out an electric blue gun-like object from his hat. With a sly grin in the direction of his friends, he walked over to the intercom on the wall. "Who wants Terry to join us for lunch?" he asked, attaching the object to the intercom.

Perry shook his head wryly at Pinky. "Is that Phineas and Ferb's digital hacker?"

Pinky shrugged as he pressed the intercom button. "All I got to say is that you got awesome owners P-Man."

"Yes, yes I do." Pinky heard Perry reply just before the booming voice of 'Major Monogram' sounded throughout the building.

"Will Agent Terry the Turtle report to the conference room immediately? Terry the Turtle, to the conference room."

5 seconds later, Terry ran into the room, saluting while dragging his lunch bag behind him. "What's the emergency Sir?" he panted, leaning over with lack of breath. Looking up, instead of seeing his boss scolding the turtle for being slow, he saw Perry, Pinky, and Dan rolling on the floor laughing. Straightening up, he glared at his friends as he sat down. "You had to do that didn't you?"

"Pinky did it!" Dan and Perry shouted at the same time.

After a while, Pinky fell asleep on the floor next to the intercom, and Dan kept rolling on the floor, trying to reach an itchy spot, which was ironically being caused by him rolling on the scratchy carpeted floor. Perry continued to eat at the table with Agent T.

Pulling food out of his lunch box, Terry smiled deviously and handed Perry a small package wrapped in lots of duct tape. Opening it, the platypus jerked backwards and fell out of his chair with a shout as a miniature gelatin monster jumped free of the sticky tape. Pinky opened his eyes and Dan stopped scratching as they heard Agent P scream. The little mutated dessert food chased Perry around the room while Terry, Dan, and Pinky watched in amusement.

"Guys!" the platypus shouted. "Get it! Kill it! Save me!"

"Oh Perry, you don't need us to help you! Remember how you kill these things? You have to EAT IT!" Terry shouted over gent P's cries for help. Glaring at him as he passed, Perry kept screaming.

"Dude, you of all people know I vowed never to eat gelatin again! SAVE ME! HELP ME! RESCUE-"

"Attention: Will Recruit C please report to the conference room. Recruit C to the conference room." Monograms voice echoed throughout the room and the entire building.

Perry and the gelatin monster ceased their chase to stare at Pinky. Terry and Dan stared at him too. Pinky stared back at them.

"Wasn't me!"

5 minutes later, Chocolate walked into the conference room, saluting her superior agents. Spying the gelatin monster still taking a breather from the chase, she picked it up and ate it.

Although Perry was grateful that the puppy had rescued him from the evil jelly, he quickly assumed the role of harsh mentor.

"Recruit C, you're late. Agent T is faster than you! He got here in 5 seconds, and he's a turtle! Learn to be on time please, Recruit. I do not tolerate tardiness." Agent P admonished.

"I'm sorry Sir; I will try to be on time from now on. Sir, Major Monogram has ordered that you take me on a mission against Doofenshmirtz tomorrow." Chocolate said quietly.

"What?" Perry cried. "It's only your first day of training! He's sending you on a mission already?" He strode quickly to the intercom and dialed the intercom-code for Monogram's office. "And with me no less…"he muttered. Turning to Pinky, he asked, "Agent Pinky, the digital hacker allows the Major to understand me, correct? I'll speak English?"

Snickering behind his paw, Pinky nodded. "Yep, you'll speak English all right…"

Nodding curtly to the agent, Perry turned and opened his mouth to speak.

"Luke, I am your father."

Terry burst out laughing, while Pinky and Dan tried to stifle their laughter behind their paws. Glaring sternly at them, Agent P turned to the digital hacker, turned a few knobs, and tried to speak again.

"The cow goes, 'Mooooooooooooooo'!"

Dan gave up and literally howled with laughter. Chocolate attempted to stay at attention, but was visibly failing. Pinky continued to giggle behind his paw, but wisely stopped when he saw the abnormally murderous look on his friends face.

Slowly and quietly, as though it were taking all of his remaining patience not to scream, Perry turned back to his fellow agents. "Agent Pinky, would you please fix this. I don't have time on my side, and I must speak with Monogram about this mission he has planned."

Serious faced, Pinky fiddled with more knobs, then backed away from Perry quickly, as though he might bite him. "Try it now. It should work." He said, and then giggled again.

Perry's look told him that it had better work. Opening his mouth, he spoke into the intercom one last time.

"Share, it shows you care!"

"AHH!" Perry jerked back as the voice of his long lost destroyed nemesis, Carlos the Clown, came out of his own mouth.

Now Pinky finally cracked up. The sight of the dog laughing was the last straw.

"THAT IS IT!" Agent P yelled. "Agents P, D, and T, you are being very disrespectful! I can't believe that! Agent Pinky, you deliberately disobeyed my order to fix the intercom. I would expect more from you three, especially in the presence of a new recruit!" Perry turned his wrath towards Chocolate. "And you!" The puppy shrank back at his voice. "I don't know what's going on with this 'mission' tomorrow, but don't think I'm very happy about going on a mission with-"

"I thought I heard…someone trying to contact my office. Is there…a problem?" Monogram appeared in the doorway. Seeing him, only Terry and Dan saluted, Perry still seething and Pinky comforting Chocolate, who seemed close to tears.

"Well…" Monogram cleared his throat. "Agent P, about the joint mission tomorrow…"

Perry's eyes lit up for a second as he looked up at Monogram.

"Just wanted to say…if you two succeed on this mission, Recruit C will gain full agent status. She hasn't completed all of her training, so I thought you could…I mean..." Monogram sighed. "You and Recruit C might have to stay extra hours tonight training. Recruits can't go on missions until they are fully trained."

"So why are you sending her on a mission tomorrow than?" Perry wanted to scream. First, the new agent turned out to be a young female. Then, Terry with his evil Jell-O, and Pinky with the intercom and Carlos. Now, he might have to stay extra hours? The last time he stayed late. Phineas and Ferb caused a ruckus, and he could barely escape to his lair under their close surveillance.

"I know you don't want to do extra work." Monogram said softly. "So let's begin finishing her training now." Monogram left the room, followed closely by Dan and Terry, both looking stunned by Perry's behavior. Pinky escorted a teary-eyed Chocolate out, glaring back towards Perry. After 5 years in OWCA with his friend, he knew Pinky meant the glare. He didn't get that glare often.

Walking to the door, he found it had locked behind his friends. Groaning, he pressed the intercom button to alert the security guards he needed the door unlocked. Instead, Carlos' voice blasted out again.

"Be my friend!"

With a furious yell, Perry ripped the digital hacker off the wall and threw it to the ground. In a burst of pent-up energy, he stomped on the remains until only dust remained. Panting, he leaned up against the locked exit doors to count how many things had already gone wrong that day.

It was going to be a long list.

Suddenly, the doors opened, spilling Perry backwards into the hallway. Holding his head in pain, he looked up. Peter the Panda waved back.

"Monogram wants you." Peter commented. He looked Perry over. "Bad day huh?"

"In a depressing nutshell, yes."

Grinning, Peter helped his friend up. "Come on, I'll come with you to the training room."

"Thanks. I appreciate the gesture."

"Nah, I just have to tell Carl something. The training room is just on my way there."

"Aaaand my day still hasn't improved…"

"Well, don't expect me to improve it. That's all up to you." Peter started walking. "I'm going, you can walk with me or not."

Perry groaned and followed Peter.


	2. Respect

**(A/N) DISCLAIMER! I do not own _Phineas and Ferb_, Doofenshmirtz, or Perry the Platypus.**

**(A/N) Zach Jett is copyrighted to Bobo2217 on Roblox**

**(A/N) Hannah Smith, Chocolate the Chocolate Lab, Mrs. Smith, Michelle, May, and Lily are copyrighted to me.**

* * *

Chocolate came home pretty late. With the combination of Agent P's anger and his want to go home on time, he had worked her very hard. The puppy crawled through the pet flap to the living room. Spying her young owner on the couch, Chocolate jumped onto her lap. The girl smiled at her pet as a woman called from upstairs.

"Hannah, what are you doing?"

Grabbing her guitar, she replied, "Homework!"

"Homework? Honey, it's the middle of summer!"

Hannah shrugged, although her mother couldn't see her. "Guitar class homework Mom." She strummed her guitar, wincing as an out-of-tune note sounded. Startled, Chocolate jumped off her lap. As Hannah began to tune the instrument, Mrs. Smith leaned in the doorway.

"And just what homework would you have for guitar homework?" her mother asked.

Testing the strings, Hannah gave the guitar one more strum. "Practice. And I have to sing some songs to practice my vocals." Her mother smiled and went back upstairs as a crash sounded from the basement. Mrs. Smith whirled around and bounded down the stairs again.

"May and Lily Smith, you'd better not be making another mess!"

As baby Michelle began to cry, Hannah groaned and ran upstairs to her room. Chocolate followed, wanting to escape the noise as much as Hannah did.

In her room, Hannah flipped a hidden switch in the wall, and the bedroom furniture dematerialized. In its place was a wall of instruments, a small stage, and a desk with lots of pens and paper. A soft couch ran along one wall, and they sat down on it. Chocolate wasn't concerned about the 'ghost furniture'. She knew that Hannah had installed technology in her room that allowed 6 different rooms to exist in the space of one.

Lightly strumming her guitar, Hannah began to hum. Chocolate smiled, her tail wagged, and her body relaxed into pet mode. Her mind however wouldn't settle on one thought. She thought of her mission tomorrow with the strangely moody Agent P, and frowned. Noticing, Hannah frowned as well. She hated to see her new pet like this. In a burst of inspiration, she began to hum the tune to one of the songs Chocolate loved. As Chocolate looked up at her, Hannah smiled and began to sing.

"You are my sunshine,

My only sunshine.

You make me happy,

When skies are gray. "

Brightening a bit, Chocolate straightened up and sang along.

"You'll never know friend,

How much I love you.

You will make my sunshine today!"

"Hannah, please explain to your dog that howling in the house is not allowed!"

"She's not howling Mom, she's singing!"

"How do you know?"

"I've heard Michelle howl. Chocolate's singing."

"I'm not that bad am I?" Chocolate whimpered, her head in her paws.

Hannah gave her a pitied glance and set down her guitar. "Even that song isn't lifting your spirits, eh?" Getting up from the couch, she flipped the secret switch again, causing the furniture to dematerialize and reappear as a bland bedroom.

Removing a leash from a hook on the wall, she fastened it to Chocolate's collar with a smile. "Want to go for a late-afternoon walk?"

* * *

Chocolate loved walks. She loved the sunshine and chasing squirrels. She loved to run even more.

Hannah? Not so much.

"Choco, slow down!" she shrieked for the fifteenth time. She dug in her heels as she tried to get a better grip on the leash. "Stop! Heel! Whoa there girl!"

Chocolate came to an abrupt stop, causing Hannah to fly head over heels onto the pavement. Groaning, she looked up to see a worried Chocolate whimpering over her and a black haired boy laughing at her. She groaned again, and not because of the pain of hitting the ground. "Zach, what are you doing here?"

"Watching your dog walk you instead of the other way around! That was an epic fail!" the spiky haired boy laughed.

Hannah got up and glared at him. "Only you would ever say, 'epic fail'. Someday, Zachary Jett, I am going to smack that goofy grin off your face."

"You always say that. So, when is 'someday'? Never? It seems like it." Zach smirked.

Staring at him, Hannah smiled deviously and shook her head. "No, I think 'someday' is today. DIE!" With a shout, she charged him. Surprised, Zach barely had time to start running. Yapping like a rabid animal (that is, like crazy), Chocolate ran after them.

After some time, Hannah chased Zach into the backyard of some of their friends. Panting, Chocolate looked up at the pink sky and flopped down on the grass to nap. Meanwhile, Hannah asked her mother's permission to stay for dinner.

She had just closed her eyes when…

"Recruit C?"

She opened her eye a bit and squinted at the animal in front of her. She closed it again. "I'm not on duty right now. Come see me tomorrow." The animal knocked on her head. "Please go away. I need sleep." When he violently shook her, she quickly opened her eyes and snapped at him. "Look, I don't know what your problem is, but-"

For the first time, she fully saw the animal who had tried to wake her.

"S-s-s-sir? What are you doing here?" Chocolate stammered.

Perry glared at her. "I live here."

"Oh, I didn't know Phineas and Ferb were your people…"

"They're not. I'm their pet."

"Oh."

"Now get out of my yard."

"I came with Hannah, I can't just-"

"I don't care. Get out."

Something in Chocolate snapped. Standing on her hind legs, she looked her superior in the eye. I'm not sure what your problem is with me, but if we're going to foil Doofenshmirtz' plot together, you need to lose the snotty attitude!"

"Excuse me? MY attitude? It's not like Doof's schemes are serious enough to foil…"

"What about the robot-bug he sent to your house? You think there wouldn't be a problem if he really had found your address?"

"Oh please, he would ring the doorbell and run away or something, nothing serious…"

"Or what about when he used the Other-Dimension-Inator? Your owners even got in that little mishap, your identity was revealed, and you and the boys were in danger every 5 seconds!"

"But-Wait, how do you know all that?"

Chocolate shrugged. "Pays to know your friends. And your enemies."

"No, I mean, HOW? All information regarding missions is case sensitive. Only Monogram and Carl can-"

Chocolate mimed typing on a keyboard. "In my spare time, I'm a master hacker."

Perry raised his eyebrows. "I officially have a grudging respect for you."

The puppy frowned. "It better be more than grudging."

Perry laughed. "You know, you're right."

"About what?"

"All of it. I DO need to lose the drill instructor attitude. Some of Doof's schemes COULD turn ugly. And I officially have COMPLETE respect for you."

Dropping down on all fours as the backyard gate swung open, Chocolate grinned. "Good."


	3. Lairs

**(A/N) DISCLAIMER! I do not own _Phineas and Ferb_, Perry the Platypus, Pinky the Chihuahua, Terry the Turtle, Phineas, Ferb, Buford, Baljeet, Isabella, and anything related to _Phineas and Ferb: Across the Second Dimension._**

**(A/N) Zach Jett is copyrighted to Bobo2217 on Roblox**

**(A/N) Hannah Smith and Chocolate the Chocolate lab are copyrighted to me.**

* * *

As Isabella and Baljeet entered the yard, Pinky and Terry followed behind them. Spotting Chocolate and Perry under the tree together, Pinky muttered, "Uh oh, cliché explosion imminent…"

Spying Phineas, Ferb, Zach and Hannah come out of the house, Perry discretely waved his friends over, just in time to catch Pinky's comment. "First off Pink, stop taking quotes from Doof's book. It's disturbing. And second, there won't be any explosions, cliché or otherwise." Chocolate here made a-" He winced, "—convincing argument."

"No more Commando P?" Terry asked.

"No, and don't call me that again."

"Yep, he's back."

All four animals moved towards the house to let the kids sit under the tree.

"Let's go hang out in your lair, P." Pinky walked over to the hidden door in the wall that was one of Perry's many lair entrances. "Yours is by far the coolest!"

"Nah. In my new fatherly attitude towards Chocolate, I say we go to her lair instead."

Chocolate looked at the ground. "We can't."

"Why not?" Terry asked. "You think it's too messy or something? Ugh, girls. You should have met my mom. She didn't even let Dad in her lair 'cause she thought it was too messy all the time. Oh, yeah, didn't I mention my mom was an OWCA agent? Well, it's a cool story-"

"That's fascinating." Perry rolled his eyes. "So why not Choco?"

"Well, quite frankly, my lair can't be clean or dirty or anything in-between."

"A perfectionist, eh? My sister was a perfectionist too," Terry began. "In fact-"

"Terry…" Perry growled.

"Sorry."

"We can't go into my lair because-" She glanced at Terry for a while before continuing. "—I don't have one."

"You don't have a lair?" all three males exclaimed at once.

"She needs a lair, tonight if possible." Perry decided. He knew exactly what he should say next, but looking over by the tree, he had a feeling he should wait a few seconds.

Sure enough, he saw his young owner's eyes light up with the enlightened look he was so used to seeing every day before his missions. Grinning, Perry and Phineas simultaneously turned to their friends.

"Guys…" Perry and Phineas said together. "I know what we're gonna do today!"

All the animals rolled over with laughter as their owners looked on.

"Why are they making so much noise?" Isabella asked.

"Maybe they did something funny and are laughing?" Baljeet offered.

"I doubt they know any jokes." Ferb said. "Animals don't do much you know."

"I'm not positive that's true…" Phineas said quietly. With a start, Perry realized that his owner was staring directly at him.

"Play dumb, play dumb!" Perry hissed as he unfocused his eyes once more.

"Won't be too hard for Terry!" Pinky snickered as he dropped his head into his paws and pretended to sleep. With a glare towards the Chihuahua, Terry withdrew into his shell. Chocolate became very interested in chasing her tail.

After what seemed like forever, the animals stopped their mindless activities and edged out of the yard, leaving their owners chatting.

"Whoa…" Chocolate staggered as she stood up. "I am officially sick of chasing my tail."

As they all straightened up and walked towards Hannah's house, the agents chatted with Chocolate. Perry lagged behind, thinking of Phineas' odd comment. Had here been a reflection in his eyes besides Perry? Perhaps, not of his pet, Perry the platypus, but maybe a reflection of—

"…a little late? Shouldn't the kids be heading home by now?"

Perry was pulled out of his daze by Terry's question. "Nope. Phineas and Ferb are hosting a sleepover tonight. They'll all be there till tomorrow night." Perry explained, then fell silent once more.

After thinking about it for a few more minutes, Perry shrugged it off. He'd figure out what had happened some other day. He ran to catch up with his friends, who were now discussing the topic of Terry's fear of giant dust bunnies.

* * *

"So, where do you want your lair?" Perry asked Chocolate. The four agents were lounging on the Smith's couch while chowing down on popcorn. Mrs. Smith and Hannah's sisters had gone shopping while Mr. Smith was still at work.

"Yeah, P-Man and I have our lairs in the basement. Terry's is out under the ornamental garden at Baljeet's house. Where's yours going to be? Pinky echoed.

Chocolate sipped her orange juice. "In Hannah's room."

All the boys did a spit take.

Terry grinned. "What do you think? We've been watching Phineas and Ferb do their spit takes!"

Chocolate rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're hilarious. But I was serious."

Chocolate was covered in a mist of spit and coffee again. She glared at Perry.

"OK, OK, that was a real spit take." Perry defended himself.

Terry grinned. "It was? I thought we were just practicing again!" Chocolate poured her orange juice into his shell. "OH, OK, THAT IS REEEEALLY COLD AND WET! OH, OH!" Terry jumped up and ran to the bathroom, yelling.

"Aaaanyways…" Chocolate began again. "I want my lair in-" She paused and took away the boys' mugs of coffee, then continued, "I want my lair in Hannah's room-"

"I don't think she understands the terms 'secret organization', 'secret agent', or 'secret lair'." Pinky whispered to Perry.

"BECAUSE…!" Pinky and Perry looked at her again. "…because Hannah's room has technology that allows lots of rooms to exist at once. Just add a new switch for a new room, and we have my secret lair that no one can find!" Chocolate let out a large breath, relieved that she had finally explained the situation.

Everyone was quiet for a minute.

Perry broke the silence. "That. Is. Brilliant!"

"What is?" Terry asked, finally emerging from the bathroom. "Pouring juice down my shell?"

Pinky smirked. "Well, yes, but Perry meant Chocolate's lair location."

"I thought we all agreed it was horrible!" Terry said.

Chocolate glared at him. "Don't make me pour this coffee down your shell," she threatened.

"OK, OK, it's brilliant…" Terry whimpered. He sat down on the couch as the other three stood up.

"Well, let's get started on your lair, Chocolate! Team Pinky, ho!" Pinky cheered. The others looked at him. "What? We're members of the Organization Without a Cool Acronym. None of us are gonna think up good names…"

Perry snickered. "I'm sure I can come up with a better name than 'Team Pinky'."

"What, 'Team Perry'?"

"Has a nice ring to it, but no. 'Team OWCA'?"

"That's been done. Maybe, 'TWCA'?"

"What's that?"

"Team Without a Cool Acronym."

"Wow that really isn't cool!"

"Do we really need a team name to make my lair guys?" Chocolate cut in.

"No, no we don't. What were you thinking Perry?"

"Hey, you started it!"

Chocolate rolled her eyes. "Chatterboxes."

"Doesn't 'chatterbox' seem like some kindergarten term?" Terry commented. "Kindergarten is a funny word. 'Kinder' means 'kids' in German. Makes sense. But 'garten' means 'meatloaf'. Kid-meatloaf. Meatloaf made of kids. Speaking of meatloaf, did you guys go to the meatloaf festival this year? I hear Tiny Cowboy preformed there! Oh man, and-Hey! Where'd you guys go?"


	4. Evil and Fireworks

**(A/N) DISCLAIMER! I do not own _Phineas and Ferb_, Doofenshmirtz, Norm, Norm's Old Head, _Get Ready for the Bettys, _or -Inators.**

**A/N) Chocolate the Chocolate Lab is copyrighted to me.**

* * *

**(Meanwhile, across town…)**

Heinz looked at the sun setting over Danville Harbor from his balcony. As he looked over his newest –Inator, an evil grin spread slowly across his face. Chuckling quietly to himself, he began to speak his thoughts aloud. "Everything is going according to plan. Francis thought he would throw in a wild card by having that dog join Perry the Platypus in the battle tomorrow, but none of them know what's coming…That dog will be easily disposed of, I will finally defeat Perry the Platypus, and eventually I will take over the ENTIRE TRI-STATE-"

"Get ready for the Bettys, ready for the Bettys  
Get ready for the Bettys, ready for the Bettys  
(Ready for the Bettys)  
Get ready for the Bettys, ready for the Bettys  
It's the best thing you can do! (Best thing you can do!)  
Get ready for the Bettys 'cause the Bettys are ready for you!"

As the song faded out, he glared in the general direction of his assistant. "Norm! You interrupted my ominous evil monologue!" Doofenshmirtz complained. "Even your mere presence makes it a lot less foreboding! What is with that silly maid outfit, anyways?"

The robot looked up from where he was working. "I'm sorry Sir. I was dusting the stereo and pressed the button by mistake."

Heinz groaned and put his face in his hands. "It's a FEATHER duster, you walking hunk of junk! How can FEATHERS press anything?"

The robot hesitated.

Dr. Doofenshmirtz shook his head. "Never mind, it's not worth my time. The moment's gone anyways."

Norm continued dusting, blowing up a cloud of dust. Heinz coughed, then sneezed. "Would you NOT do that, Norm? Stop dusting!"

"OK, Sir." Norm said. He dropped the duster and picked up a cloth. Walking over to the machine in the corner, he began to polish it. "What is this anyways, Sir?"

"DON'T TOUCH IT!" Doof yelled. Norm stopped touching it. "It's my newest –Inator you idiot, you've been here long enough to realize that's likely what it is! But honestly, don't touch it again, it's lethal." Heinz began to pace. "As to answer your question, I'm not going to tell you what it does! It's a surprise for Perry the Platypus…! Aaaand, I guess, his little friend who Francis sent to tag along with him."

Norm frowned. "So, what does it do again?"

Doof groaned. "Note to self: Reconsider replacing Norm's head with the old one again. I really need to start remembering things…"

From the basement, a voice shouted up, "That's because you're OLD and your brain is made of DOONKLEBERRIES!"

"Note to self: Reconsider DYSTROYING Norm's old head instead of replacing him!" Heinz said.

"I can HEAR you!" the voice replied.

"I KNOW, I said it LOUD! Shut up or I really WILL destroy you! " Doof said. Turning back to the –Inator and Norm, he gingerly patted the machine's chrome. "If you MUST have a name for it, just refer to it as 'The Mystery-Inator'."

"What, does it solve mysteries for you?" Norm said.

"No, it doesn't—I mean it—It's just-Ugh, never mind, just…go to your closet, I don't want to talk to you anymore. It hurts my brain trying to explain things to you." Doofenshmirtz said.

"It hurts your brain to THINK! It's too much effort for an OLD guy!" Norm's old head laughed. The door to Doofenshmirtz' apartment opened, revealing the head as it floated into the room, attached to a large propeller hat.

"I thought I told you to shut up!" Heinz glared at it.

"You did. But I don't listen to doonkleberry-brains!" Norm's old head retorted.

"That's it…" Doof frowned. He walked over to the –Inator and turned to the head, his finger poised over the 'ON' button. "Talk again, and I press it."

"With your track record, I'd be more concerned if that miserable excuse for a robot came over and tried to kill me with the feather duster." The head scoffed. Doof grinned, and pressed the button.

"My worst nightmare is to be stuck in a room with Norm for an hour. If I was threatened with that, I'd do anything to get out of it," the head said. He looked over at Doof, confused. "Where did THAT come from?"

"THAT was my –Inator. It causes people to reveal their greatest nightmares. Then, like you so GRACEFULLY admitted, they'll do anything to prevent me from pressing," Heinz gestured to a red button on the machine, "this button, which causes their nightmares to become a reality. Genius, no?"

"Uh, no..?" the head retorted weakly.

"I see you're having second thoughts on insulting me, eh? Trying to save yourself from the horrors I might cause you? Nice try. I still need a test subject, and you happen to be ready and willing," Doof said. "Well, not really WILLING, but you're here aren't you?" Laughing maniacally, he pressed the red button. Norm's old head disappeared into thin air, yelling something about resolving everything over coffee sometime. Rushing over to the door of Norm's broom closet, Heinz jiggled the knob. Sure enough, it was locked.

"Oh, hello. Are you my old head? We should spend some time together! Let's read through my instruction manual!" Doof heard Norm say from behind the door.

"Noooooooooo!" the head screamed.

Heinz grinned. "YES! I am an evil GENIUS! For realsies this time!" He walked over to the balcony where he had stood just moments before, not quite sure if the invention would work. Now that he knew it did work, and perfectly, he felt more confident than ever of his victory in the battle tomorrow. Luckily, he had convinced the doctors at the hospital that his burns were completely healed, allowing him to get out of the hospital early. How Francis had known about his early release, or how he was able to set Perry the Platypus and his little friend on his case so fast, he couldn't know. However, he was sure of one thing.

"Perry the platypus won't know what hit him."

* * *

"Wow. Nice place you got here, Choco." Pinky commented as the agents observed their work.

They had worked all night on her lair, each donating boxes of gadgets from their own lairs. Perry gave her some of the best stuff he had, knowing that Monogram would assume he had lost the items and replace them for him.

"Besides," Perry had said. "If Monogram thinks he didn't have to pay for your lair or your equipment, he'd be perfectly fine with it!"

Chocolate had appointed each of her friends over a different part of creating her lair. Perry was in charge of getting the hand-me-down gadgets set up; Pinky helped Chocolate set up the florescent lights and painting the room with glow-in-the-dark purple paint. Terry was in charge of installing the secret switch, and (with Pinky's suggestion) serving everyone else drinks and cleaning the paint supplies up afterwards.

"Let's check out how you and Pinky did on the glowing paint!" Perry said, turning off the lights. Looking around, all the agents ooh-ed and aah-ed at the glowing room.

"Uh…guys?" Terry said. Everyone looked at him and everyone but Perry burst out laughing.

"Terry…" Perry said, shaking his head, "What did you DO?"

"I…think I got some paint on me…ALL over me…" Terry said. Sure enough, he was glowing purple.

Perry rolled his eyes. "Alright, that's enough…" he said, turning on the lights again. "I do agree with Pinky though, this is pretty cool!"

"Only thanks to you all!" Chocolate said. "You guys are awesome for helping!"

Perry chuckled. "No biggy. I WOULD have given you Phineas and Ferb's digital hacker as an added bonus, but…erm…I sorta-"

"—smashed it to pieces, if Peter tells me correctly. Man Perry, you have anger issues!" Terry teased. "Maybe Monogram needs to sign you up for anger management classes!"

Perry's eyes widened. "Oh, NO WAY. If he tries, I'll show him JUST how angry I can be."

"Yeah, P-Man. Pull a 'Doofenshmirtz just inadvertently threatened my owners' move on 'im!" Pinky said.

"What? What 'move' would that be?" Perry asked, genuinely interested.

"Well...it's like...Um...Wait..." Terry attempted to demonstrate. "Wait, hold on, almost got it…It's like—POW!—then you go, HI YAH! And then I think there's a—WOAH!" Terry slipped on a missed spot of paint and landed face first on the floor. All his friends, including Perry, began laughing.

"I doubt I fell flat on my face if I ever HAVE pulled that move." Perry said.

"You did pull that move. A LOT." Terry said. "Well, minus the falling part."

"When did I do THAT? Minus the face plant part, that was a pretty complicated move!" Perry said.

"When you and your owners got caught up in that other dimension, and the other Doofenshmirtz was trying to 'doom' you all every 5 seconds, and robots were after you, and-"

"Seriously, how does everyone KNOW about that?" Perry cut Pinky off.

"It's on the OWCA internet. Duh. That's where ALL the most awesome and sometimes embarrassing stuff goes!" Pinky answered.

Perry looked at Chocolate. "I thought you said you hacked the mainframe to get that information!"

"How do you think it got up there in the first place?"

"Touché."

"OK, how about we talk some strategy for tomorrow?" Perry said to Chocolate.

Suddenly, a loud explosion was heard outside the window. All four agents ran to the window and looked into the sky. The explosions continued, but not one animal could see the source of the noise. "Here, this might help." Chocolate flipped another switch and the ceiling opened up. The floor lifted up so that the lair was on-level with the roof. After stepping out onto the roof, each of them looked into the starry night sky and gasped at what they saw.

Beautiful bursts of light were exploding in the night air, heart, rainbows, stars; the noise was almost unbearably loud, but no one could look away.

"Fireworks…" Chocolate whispered in awe.

"They're so pretty…" Terry said.

Just then, a teal rocket flew into the air and exploded into a shape that, after a moment, everyone recognized. Now fading into the smoke was an image of a platypus. Pinky, Terry, and Chocolate looked at Perry.

Perry shrugged. "Phineas and Ferb's sleepover."

"…Ohhhhh!" his friends said after a pause.

The animals gazed at the Perry fireworks until they concluded with a giant explosion of sparks in every color of the rainbow. The agents all clapped and went inside as Chocolate lowered the lair to the floor and closed the ceiling; except for Perry. Looking at the lingering smoke, he paused in thought. He was sure he had seen a lime green ray of light shooting through the final firework display towards his home. After thinking about it a bit more, he shrugged it off, convinced it was a trick of the light, or else a part of the show. He jumped off the roof and swung into the room, startling Terry and Chocolate, who weren't as used to his sudden appearances as Pinky was.

"OK, so as I was saying before, how about we go over some strategy?" Perry repeated his earlier offer.

Chocolate yawned. "Can't we do that on the fly as we go to Doof's tomorrow? Or, better yet, we could just go WITHOUT a plan and go all willy-nilly and barge in there!"

"Well, willy-nilly barging IS a plan of sorts…"

"Can we just NOT train or talk strategy? I thought you were sick of training me, you wanted to go home so bad this afternoon!"

"Fine, fine…let's go back over to my house so Phineas and Ferb don't get worried….or suspicious. I mean, all of us pets leaving at once? A bit suspicious if you ask me." Perry said.

"'A', sure, why not. 'B', no one did." Pinky said.

Perry rolled his eyes as he led the way out of the house and down the street.


	5. The Mission

**(A/N) DISCLAIMER! I do not own _Phineas and Ferb_, Doofneshmirtz, Perry the Platypus, Phineas, Ferb, Linda, or Vanessa.**

**(A/N) Chocolate the Chocolate Lab is copyrighted to me.**

* * *

"Beat you again Ferb!" Phineas laughed.

Perry stretched and yawned. Last night, he and his friends-before they left for their own homes with their owners-discreetly assisted Phineas and Ferb in cleaning up the remains for their sleepover, which had neglected to 'disappear' as Candace stated. He had fallen asleep almost as soon as he got into Phineas' bed, and was so sound asleep, he had forgotten to change beds in the night. Opening his eyes and chattering a mean less chatter, he looked over at Phineas, who had awoken before the alarm clock had begun to go off at 6:00. The red head was already performing the daily tradition of throwing a pillow in Ferb's face to wake him up.

"FERB! Wake UP already!" Phineas said as he dressed. "Time is ticking away! There's only 12 hours of daylight in a day, and take meals out of that, and we got up an hour after sunrise, and we go to bed when there's still daylight out, and so that means we have barely ANY time to invent something today, so get OUT of bed, and—"Phineas was socked in the face by the same pillow he had thrown at Ferb. He looked over at his brother.

Ferb was getting his own clothes on as he grinned at Phineas. "You're sitting there blaming ME for wasting time, when you've been rambling on. We should be down getting breakfast; I think Mum made pancakes!"

"Fine, Mr. 'I'm-Much-Smarter-Than-You'. Race you to the table!" Phineas shouted, lobbing the pillow back into Ferb's face. Laughing, Ferb chased his step-brother down the 12 stairs leading to the lower floor.

Perry got up off the bed, shaking his head in amusement. Looking out the window, he saw his host family leave in the car. After listening for any nose in the house, he grabbed a robe from underneath Phineas' mattress and went into the kitchen to pop some popcorn. After brewing coffee, he took a bag of chips from the cabinet and camped out on the sofa. Turning on the TV to his favorite soap opera, he settled in for an afternoon in front of the TV.

Suddenly, his video watch beeped, alerting him to a call. He looked down at the screen and pressed the 'accept' button. "Lazy central. A seriously tired platypus speaking."

"PERRY? What are you DOING?"

"I'm lazing around. What does it look like?" He stuck his arm out so the caller could see his spread.

"You're SUPPOSED to be getting ready for the mission today!"

Perry took a drink of his coffee, and then looked at the screen to see clearly who was calling him.

It was Chocolate.

He did a spit take, and then looked at the coffee soaked screen apologetically. "Sorry."

Chocolate rolled her eyes. "Just ditch the robe and get your fedora. Pack up the hover jet and meet me in Danville Park. 5 minutes." The screen went blank as she signed off.

Groaning, Perry got up and did as Chocolate had directed. 5 minutes later, he arrived in the air above Danville Park central. Landing his hover car on the grass, he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes as he looked around for Chocolate. Yawning, gave up. As he turned around to get back in the hover car, he yelped at what he found.

Chocolate smirked at his shocked expression as she reclined in the driver's seat of the hover car. "You are NOT giving up on me today. Get in the hover jet. I'm driving. " She paused. "I have the sudden feeling that I'm becoming the one in charge of YOU."

Perry looked at her. "Just know it's still only a feeling and will STAY that way until you get your own nemesis and full agent status."

"Right…" she said as she powered up the jet. "Why do you seem so tired today? I stayed up as late as you did last night!"

Perry shook his head. "I fell asleep as soon as I got in Phin's bed. But SOMEONE decided that the middle of the night was a good time to continuously wake Ferb and me up with new invention ideas. That and they both had a miniature pillow fight at 6:00 in the morning…"

"…and yet by 7, you were up, drinking coffee, and watching your weird soap opera."

"It's not WEIRD, and I never DID finish my coffee, because you indirectly caused me to spill it over the couch and my wrist-communication-izer."

Chocolate thrust a hot thermos into his hands. "I thought of that. Drink up."

Grinning, Perry drank as the hover car neared Doofenshmirtz Evil Inc. In 5 seconds flat, Chocolate was handed back an empty thermos by a much perkier Perry. As she landed the hover jet on the DEI roof, Perry bounced out and started jumping in one place like he had to go to the bathroom.

"I'm starting to think that that coffee was NOT decaffeinated…"

"Nope!"

"We're about to go on my first mission, I'm not sure I want you jumping around…"

"I'm gonna go beat up bad guys, that's all!"

"I'm afraid you'll blow up the whole building with your energy..."

"Doof does that anyways! Let's go in already!"

"Well then, let's go tiger!" Chocolate said, rolling her eyes.

Suddenly, the roof gave out from under them. Both agents fell the sickening 30 feet to the laboratory below.

Groaning, Chocolate looked around at their surroundings. They had landed in a small cage, the bars very close together. She spied something shimmering in between the bars, and she doubted she would want to find out what exactly it was or what it did. She looked down at Perry. The platypus had landed so hard, any energy the coffee had given him seemed to have been shocked out. He moaned as he staggered to his feet, rubbing his sore bill.

Out of the corner of her eye, Chocolate spotted a small movement. She whipped around, expecting a killer robot or something of the sort. What she didn't expect was a middle aged man walking towards the cage. She noted he walked with a slouch, and she looked up at him to study his face. As he leaned over the cage, she saw the face she had seen on all of Agent P's mission files.

"Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz, I presume?" Chocolate growled.

The scientist looked down at her and Perry. "Hello Perry the Platypus." Heinz said. "I don't know what our little friend here said, but I'm sure it was friendly!"

"Yes. I said you smell like flowers and that I love your pet unicorn." Chocolate groaned as she sat down back to back with Perry. "How can you STAND not being understood by humans?"

Perry bounced a rubber ball against the bars of the cage. "My view of it is if they don't understand you, you can say whatever you want about them!" He barely blinked when the ball missed the bars and disintegrated on contact with the air between them.

Staring at the pile of ashes, she remembered Doof. Looking up, she was startled to see his pointed nose inches away from the force field.

"Well now, I know Perry the Platypus knows how things work between us, but what about you little doggie? No? How about I tell you! Ya see…"

Chocolate looked towards Perry. "Does this guy ever shut up?"

Perry began to pull random objects from his fedora and chuck them at the force field, watching them disintegrate, burn, or explode. "No, no he doesn't. Just look like you're listening and help me toss this rubber duck into the evil force field of doom." Perry held out the little toy. "It used to be Pinky's until his owner gave it to me." He looked over at the monologueing Doof. "I say we've got a solid 5 minutes before we have to deal with him. Now…" Perry grinned evilly. "Kill the ducky!"

Chocolate hesitated, glancing at Doof, who was still rambling on.

"One time, I got attacked by a rabid blackberry that had made a nest in my tent when I was camping back in Gimmelshtump. That led to the incident with the bees, which Perry the Platypus knows about. Oh! I should tell you about the camping trip I took with my daughter, Vanessa, a few weeks ago! Oh, it was great, but it turned a bit odd at some points, I mean a giant SHOE crushed my truck, how often does that happen?"

Chocolate looked back at Perry.

"Kill it!"

Rolling her eyes, Chocolate threw the duck. As it made contact with the force field, it caught on fire. Looking on with glee, Perry walked over to it. Wanting to make sure the duck was completely destroyed, he stomped on it a few times as Chocolate looked on.

To his dismay, the stomping caused water to squirt out of the duck and extinguish the flames. Holding it up, he saw that only the left eye had melted away. Other than the lingering smell of burnt tires, the duck wasn't scratched.

"Seriously?" Perry groaned, placing the duck back into his fur pocket.

"…and THAT, Perry's friend, is the history of our battles. Among other things…Speaking of which, history is about to be made! I give you…"

"Finally!" Chocolate exclaimed.

"…the Nightmare-Inator!" Heinz finished, pushing a giant machine towards them.

"Can we escape and beat him up now?" Chocolate growled, not taking her eyes off the scientist.

"No. I'm sort of interesting in what this thing does." Perry said. "For once. Don't crush my moment."

"Of course. Wouldn't dream of it…" She turned her full attention back to Doofenshmirtz.

"…and THAT is what it does!"

Chocolate glared at Perry. "Great. With all your blabbering, we didn't hear what the Nightmare-Inator does!"

"I doubt it's serious. It shoots rubber ducks at us or something." Perry shuddered. "Then again, that WOULD be a nightmare…"

Suddenly, Perry's video watch began beeping, signaling that he had an incoming message. Beckoning Chocolate over, he pressed 'Accept'. Instantly, the familiar face o f Major Monogram appeared on the screen.

"Agent P! Recruit C! Great googly moogly, I'm glad I was able to reach you! Carl examined the video footage of the DEI lab from last night, and we were shocked at what we saw! Whatever you do, do NOT—"

The watch slipped off Perry's wrist as the cage shook back and forth violently. Looking up as she tried to avoid touching the force field, she saw Doofenshmirtz shaking the cage. "What is he DOING?"

Perry stared at the floor of the cage as the shaking stopped. "Trying to do THAT." Chocolate followed his gaze to the pile of ashes that use to be the wrist-communication-izer.

"Oh. Well, I guess he got what he wanted." Chocolate groaned. She looked back up at Doof. "Well? Anything else before we kick your sorry butt?"

"I STILL don't know what you're saying."

Chocolate rolled her eyes. "Than I'll repeat. I said, 'There's a giant killer rubber duck behind you.'" She heard a yelp behind her. "I'm kidding Perry."

"Well, now that you two are paying me SOME attention, I can use my invention. And, no matter what I do next, don't try to escape, it's not possible."

With speed Perry had never seen from Doof, he aimed the Nightmare-Inator at Perry. Before either of them could do anything…

He fired.


	6. The New Old Agent

**(A/N) DISCLAIMER! I do not own _Phineas and Ferb_, Doofneshmirtz, Monogram, Perry the Platypus, Pinky the Chihuahua, Carl Karl, Rodney, Terry the Turtle, Newton the Gnu or Ducky Momo.**

**(A/N) Angel the Arctic Fox is copyirghted to TheSecondQuincy on deviantart.**

**(A/N) Chocolate the Chocolate lab are copyrighted to me.**

* * *

_"My greatest fear is…if I was given an entire box of Duck Momo rubber ducks."_

Pinky and Terry cracked up as they replayed the segment over and over. Perry stood behind them, scowling and attempting to delete the OWCA Internet window.

"Dude!" Pinky gasped through his laughter. "You're afraid of DUCKY MOMO?"

"That's a stupid KID'S SHOW character! It may be a stupid show, but; Ducky MOMO?" Terry said.

"Hey, YOU'RE afraid of dust bunnies!"

"Touché."

"I'm not afraid of them, I just hate the creepy things. I'd be SCARED if a whole box of the evil things came for me…"

"Wait," Pinky said, "Didn't I have one of those?"

"Yep, then Isabella gave it to me. So, technically, you started this."

"Oh, NOW I understand why you hate those things! Their stupid little sound always freaked me out!"

"Yeah, and that vile thing is always THERE! It's like it STALKS me!"

"Guys!" Terry shouted. "Can we watch it now?"

"Alright, alright." Pinky said. "Hey, let's watch Perry say 'Ducky Momo' again!"

"Look, if you MUST watch this, could you please stop repeating that ONE part?" Perry groaned. "Watch the action parts wouldya?"

"'Watch the action parts, wouldya?'"

"That's not how I sound, Pinky."

"'That's not how I sound, Pinky.'"

"GUYS!" Terry shouted, exasperated. As they quieted, he rewound the video and began from after Perry confessed his fear.

* * *

"That's an…odd fear…" Heinz said. "But apparently, it's one of your deepest fears, so I think I'll make your nightmares come true!" Doof pressed the big red button as Perry closed his eyes, waiting for a flood of rubber ducks.

After a few seconds, he opened one eye, then the other. He stared around at the Ducky-Momo-less room for a moment, and then turned to Doof, who seemed as confused as he was.

"What's going on?" Heinz said, confused. "I've tested it, it worked perfectly, I don't know why it's not working now..."

Perry looked at Chocolate, who shrugged. "Don't look at me, he's YOUR nemesis! I don't know anything about how his stuff works!"

Heinz leaned over the Nightmare-Inator. "Why. Won't. It. Work?" He pressed the button with each word.

* * *

"And no ducks ever showed up?" Pinky asked Perry. Terry sighed and pressed pause on the video. By then, Dan the Dog and Newton the Gnu had joined the original three.

"Nope." Perry shook his head. "It's just as well; I hate those things! That in itself wasn't weird. Doof's inventions fail all the time." He gestured to Terry, "Play the video and you'll see the weirdest parts."

* * *

"I wonder why…" Doof pondered. He aimed the ray at Perry. "I'll just try and hit you again!" He fired for the second time.

This time, Perry was prepared. He leapt out of the aim of fire barely missing the force field in the process. Looking up, he saw Chocolate doing the same. As a result, the ray hit the cage. With a creak, the bars at the front of the cage twisted into a shape Perry could only identify as a mouth.

Perry, Chocolate, and Doofenshmirtz all stared in awe as the cage spoke out of its crude mouth.

"My greatest fear is if these two captives I am holding prisoner were to escape," the cage creaked in a hollow voice. With that, the cage fell silent.

"Well whaddya know?" Heinz said in wonder. "It works on inanimate objects too!" Suddenly, he seemed to remember that he had missed his initial target. Turning back to the –Inator, he repositioned the ray and pressed the button. When nothing happened, he looked down.

His hand was resting on the big red button.

"Noo!" he shouted as the cage began to disappear.

"Oh poo." The cage groaned before disappearing completely.

* * *

Pinky, Terry, Dan and Newton watched excitedly as the on-screen Perry and Chocolate beat up Doofenshmirtz. They clapped and cheered as they watched Chocolate press the self destruct button and escape with Perry in the hover car. Perry closed the video window and smiled.

Suddenly, the speakers crackled to life. "Will agents P, T, D, Silent G, and Perry the seriously bossy Platypus report to the conference room for my promotion ceremony? I'd appreciate your presence. In case you hadn't noticed, you're LATE." Barked a female voice.

"Oops…" Perry mumbled as they rushed out the door to the balloon decorated elevator leading to the conference room.

"Why are we taking the elevator instead of the door?" Terry asked as the doors closed on them.

Perry pulled a bow tie out of his fur pocket and attached it to his collar. "A classy entrance. Or, as classy as we can be when we're 5 minutes late. Oh, and if anyone asks, we were trying to be fashionably late and forgot the time, so now we're just late."

Every agent present agreed as the elevator doors opened. The long conference table had been moved aside to make room for over 50 chairs and their occupants. All of which (minus 5) were staring at the late arrivals.

Undaunted, Perry smiled and waved as he took his seat in the front. His more subdued friends found their spots near the front as well.

At the front of the room, standing near Chocolate, Monogram cleared his throat, obviously displeased at having been interrupted. "Anyways, (and I don't know why we hold a ceremony for this, this is SO unofficial), I officially give Chocolate the Chocolate Lab full OWCA agent status!"

There was silence in the room. Perry, eyeing Chocolate and Monogram's stern faces, decided against standing up and cheering loudly, although he was very tempted. Looking around, he saw everyone sitting perfect;y still, although ti seemed like they too wanted to cheer.

"Well. Not a lot of support from you all…" Monogram said. "Fine. Time for the after party."

With this, all the agents instantly stood up, clapped, and headed from the break room and the cafeteria. Perry, Terry, and Pinky went up to stand by Monogram and Chocolate.

"Honestly, it's like all you animals live or are the after parties!" Monogram grumbled.

"That's because we're party animals!" Perry whooped. Terry laughed, and the others groaned.

Monogram, who couldn't understand them, looked towards the door. "CARL!" The intern poked his head in the door. "What's the status on the Mexican food station?"

"They took it away again, Sir."

Monogram turned to the agents. "Carl and I are going off the lot for lunch."

"Is that allowed?" Perry asked.

"No, no it's not." Monogram said, obviously expecting this question.

"So…" Perry shuffled his feet as Monogram, Carl, Pinky, and Terry left the room. "You're a full agent now."

"Yep."

"I can't wait until you find out who your nemesis is. It's a fun experience, finding out who you'll get ot beat up for the rest o your career!"

"I already know who my nemesis is."

"Really?"

"Master hack, remember?"

"Oh, right." Perry said sheepishly. "So, who is it?"

"Some guy named Aloyse Everheart Elizabeth—"

"You got Rodney? Seriously?" Perry exclaimed.

"I guess so. Why?"

"If this makes any sense, our nemeses are nemeses! Doof and Rodney hate each other!"

"Hm. This'll be interesting then."

"Yes, yes it will. Hey, let's go get some tacos!"

"I thought the Mexican food station was gone?"

"Yeah, they first time, they REALLY took it. Now us agents just hide it to tick off Monobrow. Oh, and for the free tacos."

Chocolate giggled, then thought of something. "You and Monogram said 'they' took it. Who's 'they'?"

Perry shrugged uncomfortably. "You know, They." Chocolate still looked blank. "Those guys over there!"

Chocolate looked over to see two pale boys dressed in gray standing in the corner.

"We like tacos." They said together, their voices deadpan.

Chocolate looked at Perry. He shrugged. "I know, They're creepy. I went golfing with Doof and They followed me back here. They haven't left."

"Anyways, you mentioned tacos?"

"Yep, let's go!" The two of them began walking towards the door.

"We like tacos." They said again.

"Uh…let's just GO…." Perry pulled Chocolate out the door.

He looked at He and He looked back.

"Let's go off the lot for tacos." He said.

* * *

After lunch, Perry and Chocolate walked the halls, making plans for the afternoon.

Once again, the speakers turned on with a beep. "Agent P and AGENT C, please report to Major Monogram's office. Please." Carl's voice ceased as another beep signaled the end of the message.

Groaning, they walked to his office slowly, checking their fur for any tell tale signs of tacos. OCMing in the door, they saluted Monogram, who was sitting at his desk.

"At ease, agents." Monogram cleared his throat. "Hello, Agent P. Agent C. I've brought you two here because we—that is, the Danville OWCA—are going to acquire a new agent. She previously worked for the L.A. division, which has decided to develop a new rank of agents. She insists upon retaining her status as a 'Senior' agent. You, Agent P, as our best agent, know I don't like making one agent seem better than the other. However, despite my arguments with her Head, she insists. Agent C, as our newest agent you can learn your way around HQ with her."

"Wait…" Perry groaned. "It's another GIRL?" Chocolate elbowed him hard in the ribs. "Ouch…"

Obviously understanding his tone, Monogram looked at him pointedly. "You will treat her respectfully. She's from L.A., so she may have a certain…view on things."

"L.A.? That's where Hannah used to live! And, now that I think about it, I was born there!"

"Explains a lot…" Perry mumbled. "OUCH…"

"Both of you, do you mind?" Monogram rolled his eyes. "Anyways, I'd like to introduce you to—"

"Why, hello dear! How have you been? Happy to see me?"

Perry turned, and stood stock still at who he saw.

"My, my, Perry, you seem a bit pale! Are you sure you've been eating enough?"

Perry fell to the floor in a dead faint.

"Gee, Perry. What's up with you?" Chocolate giggled. "Well, you're not, that's for sure. You're down or the count!"

"—Angel the Arctic Fox…" Monogram stood up from is desk to see what was going on. "Agent P? Are you alright?"

Hearing a thump, Pinky poked his head in the door. Looking around, his eyes widened. Seeing Perry on the floor, a grinning Angel standing over him, and a worried Chocolate and Monogram, he chuckled.

"I'm going to like this girl."

THE END


End file.
